Dreams

There is a certain amount pressure on people to have dreams and goals. This comes about with fathers that have high expectations, the hundreds of motivational books and of course, New Years Eve. When someone has asked me what my dreams and goals are I've been annoyed because I have never been a forward thinker of more than about 5 seconds. My dreams? Well, last night I had one about a clown chasing me. Goals? Try not to fart in public. I don't think that's what people mean although the last one could be taken seriously.

It seems to me that people with dreams and goals become angry with themselves when they don't achieve the numbered items on the list. This is why I don't write down dreams and goals for myself, never have, most likely never will. Therefore when I don't accomplish said goals I won't be disappointed in myself. I already disappoint myself daily with the little things. Tim thinks this is appalling and has never understood my refusal to make goals and have dreams.

As of late though I have been dreaming of becoming a photographer, one good enough to actually have people pay me for it. One usually needs a bit of self confidence to realize their dreams and self confidence is something I lack. Sure, it may look like I have self confidence but this is a ruse. Do not be fooled. This whole photography thing is just a dream right now and maybe I will become bold enough to make it a goal in life.

Oh, my other dream is to have a maid. Ah, to have a maid. Then I wouldn't have to feel guilty sitting here writing a post while my kitchen is in serious disarray.

Dreams:
1. be a good photographer
2. get a maid

There, it is written.

Sarah

Road Rage

This week has had incident after incident of near accidents.  I have never witnessed so many awful drivers in the near 5 years I've been in Greenville.  What are these people thinking?  Do they have a death wish?  Are they just hoping someone hits them so they can claim insurance and get rid of their janky car?  Left and right people were pulling out in front of me like I was invisible.  Ooh, maybe I am!  Now that would be kickin'.  

Tim and I lived in Florida for a bit and Southwest Florida has its share of stupid drivers.  There is your 'I'm too old to drive' group which you expect because it's south Florida and then there are the 'I'm so cool' group who show up everywhere but these two groups do NOT mix well.  The old drivers insist on taking their good ol' time moseying down the main freeway (only 4 lanes btw) at the most inopportune times of the day.  Rush hour.   They are in no hurry but the dangerous part of this is they go below the speed limit, which is about 75.  Any person driving the speed limit is going to encounter these folk and inevitably you will have to slam on your brakes or slow down considerably because Mr. False Teeth thinks the sign reads 35.  Even a patient person becomes quickly irritated.  Then mix in the "cool" group.  They are quite the opposite and feel the need for speed.  They whip in and out of cars like a race track and give absolutely no consideration to others around them.  They also don't care if you're going 90 mph.  This means they have to go faster and will come up right on your tail, honking and flashing their lights.  In most places you have a good mix of drivers.  Yes, there are older drivers and dangerous drivers but for the most part people are rational.  Too bad this isn't the case in Florida.

Admittedly, I have flashed my lights at people who were in the left lane going the speed limit or below.  This is shameful I know.  I blame Florida on my road rage that I carry with me today.  Anyone who has been a passenger in my car knows how much I abuse the word moron in reference to other horrible drivers.  If someone isn't driving how I think they should I feel there is a great injustice that must be addressed.  Why do people insist on driving slow in the passing lane?  Injustice.  Why don't these morons get over when they see you trying to merge on the freeway?  Injustice.  Where do they get off cutting in front of me?  Injustice.  Can the girl in front of me not keep a normal speed limit when on the phone?  

As you can see I have some pent up agitation which I hope will not result in me going off on someone someday.  Why can't everyone drive as perfectly as me?

Morons.

My Cuddlebugs

It's my favorite time of day except for when I'm eating chocolate. The short moments between taking the dogs out in the morning and getting up to shower and make myself ready for the day. My sweet babies insist on waking me up every morning at 6 to do their business and eat. I personally hope they grow out of this with age. The only good part about this rude awakening every morning is the fact that after we go back upstairs and I crawl back into bed, my two sweethearts want to cuddle up next to me. In fact, they want to be the first one to jump up on the bed to see who can get to my side first. Flash is a gentleman. He waits until I'm in the bed and under the covers patiently waiting for my signal that he's allowed up. Lulu is a woman. She waits for no man. This has resulted in some shoving and pushing until one gives up. But I am an equal opportunity cuddler. If I lay on my back they can each get a side and put their head on my shoulders. This is my moment and I wouldn't trade it for anything. I can't wait for tomorrow morning!

While Tim and I get ready they woefully watch us from the bed half asleep knowing we will be leaving them soon. It's sad, cute and pathetic. Now you can feel sorry for them as well.

I love my sensitive, big headed Flash. He is a momma's boy

Independent diva, Lulu who never wanted to cuddle; still independent, a diva but cuddly (on her terms)

They break my heart...

Adulthood: It Welcomes You

This past week I turned the big 3-0. My age has never mattered to me before and turning 30 has not changed that. In fact, I often get my age wrong when people ask. Sometimes I make myself older. But when you turn 30 there is the teasing and goading of arriving at this stage in life. Unfortunately to the teasers and goaders I do not fall prey. I can be pretty uptight about some things but age isn't one of them. It is interesting to hear what people have to say though.

A friend of a friend wished me a happy birthday and told me "the good Lord gave me a wrinkle and a gray hair on her 30th birthday". Well, the good Lord must love me more because the wrinkles haven't made an appearance yet and the gray hair didn't show up..at least not on the day of but more of that later. My sister told me that there is a girl in her church that experienced a meltdown of sorts when turning 26. Holy crow! 26??!! Can you imagine that poor girl turning 30? She'll be in a straight jacket and padded room. Bless her heart.

Apparently when you turn 30 you're allowed to freely speak your mind. If someone gets on your nerves you can tell them they're getting on your nerves and to leave you alone instead of asking nicely or just ignoring the feeling of wanting to punch them. I don't believe I can speak my mind anymore than I already did starting at around 28. I am way ahead of the free speech game. I'm sure there were some people, namely Tim, that was hoping 30 would have an opposite effect. The hope that I would become agreeable, soft spoken, demure, ladylike. *insert a laugh and a snort*. Yeah, that ain't gonna happen. The only change I was hoping for was less acne and that hasn't kicked in yet. Really? At 30 years old I can't have less acne? Have mercy.

I do believe some of my friends were more pumped at me turning 30 than I was. It is an exciting time but lets be honest, I'm not in my prime anymore. My prime was about 24-26 and I will never see those years again. This only bothers me every great once in awhile but not due to my age. Age is just a number and as someone told me, "thirty is the new tween". I think I like him. He's a smart guy.

When it comes down to it, how old I am doesn't matter to me but I love birthdays because I love presents. And turning 30 means you get presents and a lot more than when you're 29 or 31. Next year will suck. I want to turn 30 over and over and over again. Does this mean I have to wait until I'm 40 until that goodness comes my way again? That is for the birds. I believe everyone should receive a multitude of presents every birthday. Thankfully, I have wonderful friends and family. They know me well and fed my love language of gift receiving. I felt absolutely gluttonous.

Back to the gray hair. It was the day AFTER and my friend was talking to me at work at my desk. She made a small noise out of her mouth (she does this often so I don't get alarmed) and looked at me funny. Then I had to ask her what was wrong. She proceeded to lean over and tell me I had a gray hair to which I was shocked and horrified! Thankfully she was there to notice the ONE white hair and pluck it for me before they multiplied? Oh wait, don't they multiply when you pluck them. Oh whatever. The good Lord still loves me.

Climbing the hill,
Sarah